04 4 / 2013
As the day is getting nearer, can’t help but feeling a lil lost because i seem to be oblivious about it. Some days i’ll be real motivated, happy & motivate people around me whenever i can but on some days, i feel really sucky. Wasting like time, doing nonsense, doing senseless stuffs. Then I’ll be questioning myself, what the hell am i doing but yet still continue doing it lol.
I’m just making up excuses to myself, compromising with myself and doing stuffs which i shouldn’t. I’m really wasting my time man.
Always said that i wanted to do something BIG for God, be a blessing in other’s life but yet. Meh? All words, no action. Not exactly no action to be honest but it don’t last. My actions doesn’t last. Probably just one day? Two day? Probably just a few days and i’m back to square one. Quite frustrating sigh.
Then again, got to keep trying isn’t it. Too sinful, i’m too sinful. Making too many mistakes which i could have avoided but i didn’t. Dear Lord, please cleanse my sin i beg….
Also, been trying to step out of my comfort zone these years, and i think i’ve been improving. But still, not enough. Not there yet. I’m still too awkward. Can’t seem to open up to people, still. If this doesn’t improve, i’ll have a not-so-great time in school. Really. Meh.
Too much drama recent years, self inflicted dramas included.
I want to become more Holy. Can i? I want to meet God and have God praising me: You have done well Child, come to my side now.
28 2 / 2013
Please give me the willpower to forgive and the power to stand strong.
Please bless me with the strength to carry on and to bring happiness to others.